Chris Sevier from Utah is seeking to marry his laptop and demand a cake to celebrate the union between one man and one machine. He claims if same-sex couples are able to get married and demand that Christian bakers bake them wedding cakes, then he should be allowed to have the same done for his beloved computer.
Sevier, who self-identifies as a “machinist,” says he married his laptop in a ceremony in New Mexico, and now he has sued to demand that a Colorado baker make cakes for him and his computer “bride.” Sevier filed an additional lawsuit demanding that Utah recognize his man-object marriage.
The legality of the marriage remains ambiguous, since the area remains grey in complexity after the U.S. Supreme Court in 2015 established a constitutional right to same-sex marriage. For the time being, a judge in Utah has allowed part of that lawsuit to proceed. In the lawsuit, Sevier and his self-identified polygamist associates write:
“If marriage based on self-asserted sex-based identity narratives is a ‘fundamental right,’ ‘individual right,’ ‘existing right,’ based on a ‘personal choice’ for homosexuals, then clearly it is also a ‘fundamental right,’ ‘individual right,’ ‘existing right,’ based on a ‘personal choice’ for polygamists, zoophiles and machinists.”
Masterpiece Cakeshop baker Jack Phillips is already slated for a day in the Supreme Court this year after refusing to bake for a same-sex marriage. Justices said they would hear his appeal of a Colorado civil rights office that penalized him for refusing to bake a cake for a same-sex wedding.
Sevier claims if Colorado can force Phillips to bake a same-sex wedding cake, then the state government can also force Phillips to bake a man-machine cake for Sevier’s and his unnamed computer spouse’s own wedding.
In the lawsuit against the Colorado bakery, Sevier is requesting from a judge to rule that the baker discriminated against the plaintiffs and wants him to provide service to machinists and polygamists just as he would traditional couples, and to reward monetary damages in the amount of $75,000.
“The Plaintiffs also want to use the government to proselytize the Defendants into converting to their worldview in name of love and equality,” reads the complaint.
He told The Washington Times that the goal of his lawsuits is to have the courts act honestly and restore the integrity of the Constitution. Sevier also wants the issue to be governed by the First Amendment.
“The entire Constitutional narrative is the wrong one,” said Mr. Sevier. “The courts have been incredibly intellectually dishonest in these matters. They are perpetrating unbelievable amounts of malpractice.”
John Eastman, a law professor at Chapman University in California, said of Sevier’s lawsuit: “Of course the suit is nonsensical, and I suspect the lower court will treat it as such. But then, so too was Obergefell’s holding that biological sex has nothing to do with marriage.”
Robert Tuttle, a law professor at George Washington University, also claims that the case is wrapped in absurdity:” There’s just no legal basis for these claims. This is certainly attention-seeking.”
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